Walk the Line (2005, U.S.)

Here's yet another biographical film that never really interested me, but suddenly when I was cataloging it at work, I just had to see it. It was an excellent choice.

Reese Witherspoon was phenomenal as June Carter. Joaquin Phoenix was okay, though he was rather on and off. Toward the end he was amazing, and he also was in his drugged haze. His early singing was rather weak and might have been better if it was lip synced. His voice was much stronger at the end, especially in Folsom Prison and in Ontario. However, he had a majorly crazy singing face that looked like he was constipated or in pain or two seconds away from passing out. Maybe Johnny Cash really looked like that while singing, I don't know, but it was a bit off-putting. In terms of the rest of the cast, Tyler Hilton as Elvis was the worst casting choice ever, but I absolutely loved Jerry Lee Lewis. The chemistry between the entire cast was absolutely palpable.

Watching this gave a very good sense of musicians' road life in the middle decades of the 20th century. The costumes, props, and sets were perfect vehicles to transport the viewer back 50, 60 years.

The film seemed to go on forever, but not in a bad way. It was like I was so lost in the story that I had to wake up and readjust to reality when it was over. I even watched the deleted scenes, which I don't often do with this kind of film. I thought that too much was left out of the story, though I recognize the need to edit and thought they picked events well. I'm amazed that I was so interested that I wanted more. In fact, I went straight back to the library and checked out Johnny Cash's greatest hits.

Magnificent.

Rating: 4.5

Cutthroat Island (1995, U.S.)

I didn't realize this when I watched it, but apparently this movie bankrupted the production company and is in the Guinness Book of World Records as the biggest box office flop of all time.

I didn't think it was that bad, though it was very 1995. The score was no Pirates of the Caribbean, but it was pretty good pirate movie music nonetheless. The plot was decent plot, and the script was sprinkled with mildly amusing one-liners and good fight scenes.

Every now and then I would notice an anachronism, such as the cannons not rolling backwards when fired in an early fight scene, but in a later scene they were. Small compared to the whole female pirate, treasure maps on scalps, and other odd elements of the story.

Still, if you like campy pirate flicks, this one's for you.

Rating: 3.0

The Adventures of Milo and Otis (1986, Japan)

I remembered this movie very fondly from my childhood. I couldn't remember what it was about, other than the obvious cat/dog friendship. I decided to check it out from the library to "watch with my cats," two orange tabbies. This ended up being quite amusing, because one of them sat and watched almost the entire thing, and the other investigated for at least a few minutes.

You really have to appreciate the dedication of a crew that would spend four years filming live animals. I gather that there were some accusations of animal cruelty, but I don't know what came of that. It seemed to me that most of the action was realistic in terms of animals' real lives. I was surprised to see that the two had litters of kittens and puppies, which I don't recall from my childhood viewings. Still, it was done tastefully enough that a young child can watch it without figuring out what's going on (as I must have once).

I was shocked to find that I still loved this movie, which I have such fond memories of, as an adult. I think this is a wonderful, wonderful family movie. Very sweet. And two out of two cats agree!

Rating: 4.0

Easy Living (1937, U.S.)

This is precisely what you'd expect of a mistaken identity comedy of the 1930s. In other words, very sweet and very enjoyable.

When J.P. Ball, a wealthy financier, gets sick of his wife's spending habits and throws her sable coat out the window, it lands on struggling single gal Mary Smith. This sets off a chain of events that causes her to get fired from her job, convinces hotel manager Louis Louis to think she's Ball's mistress, and leads her to meet Ball's son, who's also out looking for work to get out from under his father's control.

If this was one of those screwball comedies starring Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant, it would be a lot different. I don't know if "sexier" is the word, considering we're talking about the 1930s. "Smarter" may be the word, both in the sense of "hipper" and "cleverer." One should avoid comparisons though, because as I said, this one was very sweet. I do love the sassy ones, but I liked this one too—it's nice to have a little variety.

Rating: 3.5

Lords of Dogtown (2005, U.S.)

This is the second 1970s biographical film I've watched this year, and it surprised me as much as The Runaways did. The subject matter isn't exactly the kind of thing that appeals to me, but I watched it because I've been meaning to for ages, since I plan to see every Heath Ledger film eventually. And I'm actually glad I did.

This film really captured the time, the movement, the people. Everything about it, from the costuming to the setting to the scripting to the acting, was perfect. It was especially great because I learned something I didn't know anything about.

The relationships between the boys were powerfully captured. In fact every relationship (parents, girlfriends, mentors, enemies) was so complex and real. I wish I could describe how strong these characters and their relationships were projected. It was the people, more than the plot, that made this film.

And of course, I can't make it through Heath Ledger movies anymore without crying. I thought I would make it through this one until they show his character, Skip, all alone, no longer his own boss, singing to himself and contemplating a bottle. Ledger could convey the emotion of loneliness better than anyone I've ever seen. (I do wonder what the deal is with his flat American accent though.) I would say his last scene was the best of the movie, but it had a lot of competition.

I wish I could do this one justice, but I can't. Please just take my word for it that this is a wonderful, moving, fascinating film, and remember that this is the word of a person who has approximately zero interest in the 1970s, skateboarding, California, teenage boys, or practically any other thing associated with this one.

Incredible.

Rating: 4.5

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time (2010, U.S.)

I truly hope the subtitle doesn't imply they're planning a sequel, because this one wasn't very good. It was better than some other things I've seen lately, but still, not great.

In my humble opinion, Jake Gyllenhall is one of the most talented actors of his generation. What was he thinking accepting this movie? He wasn't bad as an action hero, but he's much more attractive and convincing as the slender, nerdy boy next door or as a sweet, shy but self-assured cowboy (as in Proof and Brokeback Mountain, two of my favorite performances of his). Who was this buff hero? Also, he had a strange, mild accent of no discernible origin. I guess it was supposed to be Persian, but I don't know. At least you can still say it was consistent though.

There was some good action here, but the plot was a bit hard to follow at times. If this makes any sense at all, part of their failure was the introduction of an object's concept without showing said object (i.e. the titular sands of time). It didn't work.

The music was underwhelming, which was a disappointment to me. A score can make or break a movie, and a good score here would have made it a bit more bearable. (Especially disappointing because I usually love Harry Gregson-Wililams' work.)

I can say that there were a few mildly amusing lines. Alfred Molina was especially funny as an anti-tax, anti-government "small businessman." Almost incongruous in ancient Persia, but somehow it worked for this particular movie. On the other hand, his character and other things meant anachronisms all over the place. If you're looking for anything close to historical accuracy, look elsewhere.

Further faults? Predictable villain. Pretty tepid, weak romance—the movie would have been better off without it at all. Eh. Oh, and then there's the weird déjà vu feeling, a product of the very Aladdin feel at the beginning and the very Gollum at Mount Doom climax. Does that give too much away? Oh well, if you don't see it now, you're not missing much.

Rating: 2.0

Fireball (2009, Canada)

So, I watched this in an attempt to erase the memory of The Lost Samaritan out of my head and replace it with a better Ian Somerhalder. I should have known better. Hello, look at this poster. That about sums up the movie.

A violent football player, Draven, wants to get revenge on all the people who've done him wrong. Somehow his body chemistry changes and he becomes a human torch. A fire investigator and a federal suit try to track him down, as he sets fire to everything. The big finale takes place in a nuclear plant.

Yeah, terrible. This is beyond B. There are no words. Bad writing, bad acting, bad scoring, bad everything. I don't know how I made it to the end. Don't watch it.

Rating: 1.0

Ondine (2009, Ireland)

I was rather intrigued by the concept of this film. Also I hadn't seen an Irish film in awhile, and I was curious to see what kind of film would cause Colin Farrell to leave Hollywood and return to Ireland.

Syracuse, who's better known as Circus because of his drunken antics, has a disabled daughter whose mother he's estranged from. He's a fisherman, and one day he catches a beautiful woman in his net. She says her name is Ondine, which means "she came from the sea." His daughter thinks Ondine is a selkie; Circus thinks he's falling in love.

Ondine is a modern Irish fairy tale, but it has all the magic and darkness of old Irish fairy tales and all the bleak realism of modern Irish life. I guess you could call it magical realism. It is damp, poor, sad, magical, beautiful, wonderful Ireland at its best. The contrast between the fantasy story and the true story is perfectly balanced. The score was mostly this (I can't help using the word yet again) magical-sounding guitar music which fit perfectly. And Colin Farrell was brilliant, a strong choice for the role of an almost weak and broken man. The girl who played Ondine was also talented, and the girl who played the daughter nearly stole the show.

Beautiful. Magical. Highly recommended.

Rating: 4.0

The Lost Samaritan (2008, Germany)

Terrible. Terrible! I was feeling the need to watch something with Ian Somerholder in it, and this was a definite mistake. An accountant has a long night at the office, and on the way home helps an injured motorist, which leads to him becoming the target of two dangerous assassins. I can't even remember how. Then he gets home to find his wife cheating on him, and the assassins follow him there, so he goes to a cafe and the waitress ends up tagging along on his adventures. How does any of this make sense? There's no clear plot, and that's the least of the problems with this travesty.

The music was way over the top music. I gather that this movie was made in Germany, and all the German actors who were supposed to be Hispanic or white Americans still had German accents. The script was ridiculous, writing beyond terrible. The one major "why" of the plot was never answered. The accountant's relationship with the waitress makes no sense. And to top it off, the girl's not even sexy and she tries too hard.

What was Ian Somerhalder thinking? He's a pretty talented actor. This was just sad.

Rating: 1.5

The Dinner Game (1998, France)

As I was watching this film, it occurred to me that it seemed very familiar. Turns out that it was the inspiration for the American movie Dinner for Schmucks. This is a perfect example of how much more class the French have than Americans. This movie was pretty entertaining, whereas the American one just looks tasteless.

Pierre and his friends have a weekly meal where they must bring an "idiot," competing for the best one. Pierre's idiot meets him at house (and how he gets him there is convincing enough to be believable), but Pierre's had a back injury and can't go. His idiot tries to help him, and naturally does everything wrong and aggravates every situation.

It's pretty funny for what it is. I'm a little iffy on comedies that rely on mocking people for laughs, but because it ends (and this is not really a spoiler) with the jerk learning from the idiot, it works out okay. This is another very French one. Didn't like it as much as the last one I watched, but still enjoyable.

Rating: 3.0